[EMPLOYEE]: (sounds eager to help) Yes ma'am?
[WOMAN]: How did this chicken die?
[EMPLOYEE]: (confused) Excuse me?
[WOMAN]: This chicken. How did it die?
[EMPLOYEE]: (surprised) Well, all of these chickens were grown on a chicken farm a few hours north of here. The birds are hung by their feet on coveyor belts, and are then passed through an electrically-charged water bath that is supposed to stun them so they have no feeling when the time comes for their heads to be cut off.
[WOMAN]: (thoroughly horrified) Are there any chickens who die of natural causes?
[EMPLOYEE]: (still trying to remain courteous, all though somewhat annoyed at this point) No ma'am. If a chicken dies of natural causes, the meat usually isn't used, mainly out of fears of disease.
[WOMAN]: Are there any chickens that die of old age?
[EMPLOYEE]: (frustrated) No-- old age is considered a natural cause of death.
[WOMAN]: I see. Well, do you know if they feel any pain when they're being killed?
[EMPLOYEE]: (sarcastic) I do. They feel absolutley nothing. In fact, they like being killed.
[WOMAN]: (unable to detect sarcasm) Ok-- I'll just look at the beef.
(employee turns to walk away, woman stops him)]
(stops, turns slowly, tries to act nice, clearly annoyed as hell)
[WOMAN]: Do you know how this cow was killed?
Monday, April 05, 2004