The Randomness Continues

Thursday, July 10, 2003

WISEGUYISM # 17: 15% JUICE????

You buy a bottle of juice. JUICE! It says 15% juice. If it's not ALL juice, what's in it? I want pure orange juice people! PURE! I dont want to drink something that has so many preservatives in it that if you left it around for 2,000 years some space man could drink it. (Like Hotdogs!)

WISEGUYSISM # 555: LACTOSE INTOLERANT COWS

Is there such thing as a lactose intolerant cow? I mean, people can be allergic to sunlight and water... can't cows be allergic to milk?

WISEGUYISM # 2: BUYING QUARTERS

I was at a store where they were selling state quarters for $1.50! You can get them for free when you buy something you morons, you're paying $1.50 for a quarter!!!!!!!

WISEGUYISM #15: "LAW-SUIT"

A woman filed a law suit against her former employer, the head of Law Firm. When her boss arrived at work he found her sitting in her underwear next to a filing cabinet. HAHAHA!


WISEGUYISM # 60: AMERICAN FOOD?

Why is there no american food? What would it be? Hamburgers? Hamburgers are paired with FRENCH fries... suspicious isn't it? I know they tried making 'freedom fries' and 'freedom toast', but they will always be suspicious (it's the French's way of spying on us... through food!)


WISEGUYISM # 779: WHATS THE DEAL WITH NINJAS?

If a ninja wore a business suit he'd be able to attack people a lot easier. Urban camouflage. But ninjas have to dress all in black, maye "wyaahhhhhh" noises, and carry large swords. An urban ninja with a gun is a lot scarier than an obvious black ninja with a big sword. And we wont even talk about the bathroom ninjas. I saw one once that was wearing a pink bath robe and carrying a plunger. I asked him what the deal was with his outfit, and after he beat with the plunger he told me his ninja outfit was at the cleaners.

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